Today was supposed to be a fun mom and daughter day. We met some girlfriends at the movies to see Beauty and the Beast. It was GREAT! The girls were so excited and loved the movie :) Once it was over?!? Not so much!
I dumped the popcorn, couldn't find the 3D glasses (which I knew would later cause hysterics, I mean they were uber cool with the beauty and the beast logo splattered all over them after all), and Mad couldn't find her coat. Once I had semi gotten it together, we joined some of our friends in the theater lobby.
In typical fashion, the girls all started begging for a playdate, because one special thing is never enough ya know... I told Mad no because we had other things to do, which of course was met with tears and WHINES... My friend said the girls could come over tomorrow which perked my little princess right up until she realized it was TOMORROW and NOT today... So the fit began and to the car we went; where I informed her no way in h-e- double hockey sticks was she going to be attending the playdate tomorrow. Of course THAT really set her off!
Seriously?!? I mean did I want to pay 22 dollars to see a movie that we ALREADY OWN? No! We went because SHE would enjoy it. Did she ever even say thanks for taking me to the movies? Nope! It's just expected and NOT appreciated.
It's not just Madison, nor is it just my kids. Most of my friends have voiced at one time or another how "spoiled" or "entitled" their children can be. Am I implying these are BAD kids, by no means. They are sweet, loving, and great kids, but they do all have this give-me mentality in some way, shape, or form.
My kids ask almost every day, what are we doing special today and if I have nothing planned I'm met with blank stares. I mean they are truly stumped. Nothing? Hmmm, now THAT'S a new concept.
Each day on the way to pick Anthony up from school Madison pesters me about having a playdate after school with her best bud. If I say no? I get MAJOR 'Tude. Why must there be a playdate EVERY day or even 3 days a week? It's too much!
As soon as Anthony greets me with his afternoon hug, he looks at me and asks if I got him anything special today... Yeah, no! You do not get something special everyday. It's HIS job to go to school and behave. He is not getting rewarded for what he is EXPECTED to do!
McDonald's? Yeah not a treat here. They want Dairy Queen, ok let's go. Jason and I like to get ice cream and majority of the time hitting the drive thru is a necessity or poor planning on MY part.
My kids are not the kids screaming in Target because I said they weren't getting a toy.
However, they are the kids who expect to be entertained All. The. Time.
Jason and I waited to have children a LONG time. We waited because we wanted to be better financially. We wanted for me to stay home with them., so we waited We waited because we wanted to give and do all the things we were not able to as children.
Being home with them was sometimes LONELY. I finally made some friends (we lived in a new area) and I began filling our days with day trips, playdates, and all kinds of fun stuff. I enjoy it, I really do! This is what I waited for. Getting together with friends is good for them AND me!
BUT, where exactly did I go wrong? Somehow, I find myself with children who EXPECT and DO NOT appreciate all that I do for them. We spend a day at the children's museum, do I hear thank you? Of course not. If we meet up with friends at the park, do they appreciate it? Nah. I just hear what are we doing next.
I am aware I have created this. I am aware that I must FIX this, but I question how? The first thing, we are SO NOT doing a playdate tomorrow FOR SURE! We are staying home, just the three of us. Enjoying each other. I do know that we are NOT going to be getting together at every whim and I am not planning out everyday. That is my start, but I am not sure where to go from there....
I have two great kids. They are both funny, sweet, loving, compassionate, and they have captivated my heart in a way I cannot even begin to explain. I love to "do" for them and I love to experience the world through them, but I think I have been selfish and all they have gained from my selfishness is a lack of appreciation... So, casa de crazy is going back. Way back. Back to the basics. We are going to be pretty boring until they begin to appreciate versus expect the things we do...
Any words of wisdom? Please tell me I am not the only one that feels this way!