If only it were true...

Over breakfast Anthony declared he is going to be a policeman when he grew up!

Jason: You are? Your gonna be a police man?
Anthony: Ok, Ok, I'll just stay home forever....

How I wish they both would stay home forever....

The whirlwind is over....

WOW. Christmas came quick and was over even more quickly! I think going out of town after Thanksgiving was not my brightest idea as, I felt like I was playing catch up and was not on top of anything! The season crept up on me, but even though I was half nuts, running around like a mad woman, I totally enjoyed it!

Madison's Christmas program was adorable. Her class sang Marry Had a Little Lamb and a song I had never heard before... They all had sheep hats and looked PRECIOUS!

We managed to bake some cookies (even after my mother in law interrupted our baking day) and make some sweets...

her new thing: to wink and give thumbs up!

Gifts were purchased and wrapped. The Nutcracker was seen and enjoyed... And we even managed to make our traditional gingerbread house or train... Which I must say, the kids did FANTASTIC this year and we did not help at all (aside from the construction)

Milk was poured, cookies laid out, and reindeer food sprinkled. Christmas Eve was here in a blink and we were mostly ready!



 We worked most of the evening assembling, organizing, and playing while the minis drifted off to the land of slumber... As soon as Santa's elves hit the pillow the minis barged in and Christmas morning began! We heard squeals, and laughter, saw smiles and hugs, and my heart over flowed from the joy in my family room. Wishes came true in the form of Princess Barbies and Lionel train sets... Surprises were had with games and our very own air hockey table... But my most favorite part was when Anthony threw the present Madison had selected for him to the ground as soon as he caught a peek, ran to her with his arms spread wide, squeezed her tight as he screamed "Thank you so much Mad, you are the BESTEST sister EVER! I always wanted a roller coaster" Warmed my heart.

We spent the day building, game playing, nail painting, and just having fun. It was PERFECT! The next day we headed out and surprised my parents with a visit. They were completely shocked and that made my day. We had a wonderful visit (even if it was FREEZING!)

Anthony was NOT pulling her tail, I SWEAR! :) He just wanted to hold a part of her too... lol

Now were home and I fear Christmas Break is almost over and that saddens me! How many days til Spring Break?!?

Who does this?!?!

Sunday morning I woke up knowing that it was finally time. I HAD to do all the Christmas baking! The minis and I were gonna mix, beat, measure, and spoon TONS of cookies... I was ready, they were ready, and my kitchen was ready to be DESTROYED! Just as we were finishing up the first batch the phone rang...

As I was in a rather cheerful mood, so when I saw the caller ID flash as Jason's mom, I  decided to actually answer. (I NEVER take her calls. Ever. She only calls Jason's cell phone because I DO NOT answer. Before you judge.. this IS the woman who called off my wedding (long story) and has been terrible over the years hence my NOT answering!!) What was I thinking?!?! It must have been a moment of weakness or the sugar high I was riding or I had a brief stint of being IN-FREAKING-SANE!

As I hung up the phone I was shaking, on the verge of a a MAJOR panic attack. I quickly CHEWED an Ativan, took stock of my totally trashed house, the flour dusted across the kitchen, looked at my pajama wearing no shower having self, and flipped the #*!@ out!

The woman was an HOUR away and on her way to my house! Unannounced! Unexpected!

I begged my children to clean the play room as I dashed upstairs to get my husband who worked overnight out of bed so he could help me do something (ok anything) so that we all would appear to be the perfect family with the perfect home leading perfect lives! (it is all about the appearances after all)

The tears streamed down my cheeks as I took the fastest shower in the history of showers. All I could think was WHO FREAKING DOES THIS!?!? As I dressed and pulled my hair back in  what I hope appeared to be a sheik and sleek ponytail I finally got it together.

We looked like a Norman Rockwell painting... The minis were adorable, the house appeared perfect, I looked totally together, and Jason was a proud little daddy and husband. We totally pulled it off... and I had time to spare!

BUT...

If a closet would have been opened or a drawer pulled open I would have been S.C.R.E.W.E.D!

If I am honest the visit wasn't so bad. Short and sweet just how I like it... If we had a relationship the whole thing would have been NO BIG DEAL, but since there is NONE it was a HUGE deal! I vow to NEVER EVER do this to my son and his wife... EVER!

Wordless Wednesday

♥ My Little Lamb ♥

Christmas Program 2010

For more WW: A Beautiful Mess, Look at What Mom found... and Dad too,  Momspective,  Wordless Wednesday ,

THE Christmas Card

THE Christmas card is complete... It took two attempts and 300 plus shots, but I finally got something to work with. The first attempt went south quick because Madison was in one of her moody Mad moods... Is it perfect? No way, but it is ok! Maybe one year I will manage to get a PERFECT picture of the both of them...

What I was working with:

I think my finished product is ok. I LOVE the card, the pic? eh... could have been better but could have been WORSE for sure!

With Love Chartreuse Christmas 5x7 folded card

Create unique Christmas cards with Shutterfly.

View the entire collection of cards.

Am I the only one with Christmas Picture drama? Please say NO!

Things that make you ...

wanna scream: SERIOUSLY?!?!

Just as I stripped down and was getting ready to step into the steamy shower, my thoughts of 5 minutes of peace were shattered.

"MOOOOOM", Madison shouted from downstairs, "Come wipe my BUTT!!!!"

With a very large sigh, I urged her to wipe her own butt for once, "Mad, I am just getting into the shower so you need to wipe your own butt today" and into the shower I went.

It wasn't a long shower, just the typical Mom shower... Wash hair, rinse hair, drag a razor across each leg and pit hoping you didn't miss too much, soap up and voila finished in less then 5 minutes...

As I grabbed my towel, I could hear crying... Ok, a full blooded screaming fit! "Whaaaaat is the problem?!?!" I shout downstairs to my totally pissed off daughter! "You didn't wipe my BUTT! I AM CALLING YOU FOR ALOTTA  LONG TIMES!!!"

I looked at my self in the didn't even have a chance to fog up mirror and nodded my head... Yes, this is my life... I quickly put a towel on my head and body and shivered my wet self down the stairs to where I am met with my daughter on all floors, butt held high, tears streaking her cheeks, and a smile.... "Now will you wipe my butt?!?"

Of course I did, but what I really wanted to do was run for the hills where the showers are long, the sleep is plenty, and I am not called Mom! haha Such is the season of life I am in... One day I will miss this.... Right?

****



My cute little diva on the way to Florida....

My new bundle of joy!

We have had a super sweet new addition added to our family of four! Little Miss Juliet arrived Monday the 6th and she has been loved on tons, smooched many, and has fit right into the groove at Casa de Crazy!

car ride to her new home!

I drove two hours to get this little pooch and she has not left my side since... She is just like a new baby, always wanting to be held, picked up, and snuggled! Madison went gaga when she saw her and I don't think she has given her a moments rest since... I see Juliet's days filled with dress up and baby stroller rides!



Holding her captive...

 Anthony was a bit standoff-ish... He had very little interest, and of course that meant she LOVED him! They have since become buddies. When she's ready to go to bed at night and we are not, she creeps off into his room, some how manages to jump onto his HIGH bed, and snuggles right on in... Once she sees us heading to bed, she FLIES into our room and dives under the covers IMMEDIATELY, where she sleeps all night long... I won't lie I feared she would suffocate, but somehow she manages to breathe...

Notice the leg draped over her 8 pound body :)

Juliet was just the breath of fresh air we all needed. She is sweet and fun and I just love having her by my side :)  We have missed having a pooch around and she rocks (especially since there is NO dog hair and she is house trained already!!)!

Wordless Wednesday

For more WW: A Beautiful Mess, Look at What Mom found... and Dad too,  Momspective,  Wordless Wednesday ,

The Nutcracker

Since Madison was a wee little baby I had visions of having a mommy and daughter date night to see The Nutcracker each year and I felt this year was the perfect year to start the tradition. She LOVES everything ballet and I just knew she would fall in love with the story!

A few weeks ago, I received Prima Princessa Presents: The Nutcracker in the mail from the peeps at NCircle and the movie could not have come at a better time! Madison loves watching and learning even more about ballet. We both loved how the hour long video shows clips from England's Birmingham Royal Ballet performing The Nutcracker as well as teaches your little ballerina some positions and "moves". The DVD is has a SRP of $6.99 and can be bought at Amazon and NCircle... The movie gave Madison the perfect introduction to The Nutcracker and I was glad she kinda new what to expect once we went to the performance together :)

Madison was thrilled when we dropped her brother off with a friend and headed out to our pre-ballet dinner, just the two of us (we met some friends, but it was just "us girls")... Once we got to the theater she was delighted! She LOVED watching the ballerinas do their thing and she was just mesmerized. During intermission she danced, twirled, and tippy toed in the aisle. We had a great time and I cannot wait to go again next year! I think this is going to be a FABU mommy and daughter tradition... LOVE it!

NOTE: NCircle Entertainment gave me a copy of  Prima Princessa Presents: The Nutcracker to review. This did not shape or influence my review at all! This product was Kid Tested & Mother Approved :) Thanks NCircle!

We're Baaaack!

Disney was a blast! The kids were super excited and magic was had by all! I do have to say the trip was MUCH more difficult with a three year old and a five year old then it was with an 18 month old and a three year old like last time... I felt like all I did was hold Madison, take small people to the bathroom, and wipe butts. I do believe I saw EVERY. SINGLE. POTTY. in all of Disney!

The trip would not have been complete with out some typical casa de crazy... Madison somehow managed to pee all over her panties even though she was on the potty and let's just say she was not happy about going commando (this bad mommy no longer carries a change of clothes EVERYWHERE I go... I thought I was passed that phase of life)....

Anthony somehow managed to flip a plate, ice cream, and silverware across a restaurant "by accident" (aka goofing off and not sitting correctly) Thankfully, the place is full of families and I am sure that was NOT the first time it had happened, so the embarrassment was not quite as high...

Jason raced Madison to the potty at Epcot as Anthony I entered a show and just as he was setting her up to pee she let loose and PEED everywhere... He legs were soaked, her boots were soggy, and her panties again ended up in the trash and the little princess became a pro at "letting her gina breathe"... Jason was horrified because the dye from her knock off Uggs left a puddle of poo colored pee on the floor so apparently he frantically sopped it up before someone would see the, as he called it, "shit pool"....



Anthony's most favorite thing to do was to mimic people as they walked by... A random dad of tweens happened to notice and played along... They marched, waddled, skipped, and twirled around the resort together and the laughter from both of them was heartwarming.... I seem to have quite the comedian on my hands!

We managed to get in some pool time and Anthony totally dug the slides! Madison was a happy clam just swimming and floating around.

Some time to play and dig in the sand was also made... There is something about sand that will occupy my minis for HOURS!

The minis were quite adventurous this trip! They LOVED the roller coasters, Soarin', Tower of Terror, but their absolute fave was The "hunted" (haunted) mansion... The minis absolutely LOVED all the 3D shows and seeing them in the glasses cracked me up!

The parks were mostly empty which was AWESOME! Character dining was a HUGE hit and the smiles the characters produced were priceless!

We headed home with TONS of memories and completely exhausted...

Yet somehow, we still remained a happy family!

and he says I'm a BAD driver....

**Since we are away this week, I thought I would post some funnies from the past... Originally posted July 2010)**

If you remember not too long ago, Mr. Jason had to take a defensive driving class because he had too many tickets and was about to lose his license... This just cracked me up! So mean I know, but it was funny... I am not too sure he learned much from his driving school experience...

The other day we were heading home and as we were approaching the railroad tracks by my house the signals started blinking so Jason stopped. We were chatting away and I notice the train was a ways down the tracks and moving really SLOW... The train was wailing his horn (?) much more so than normal but whatever... We continued our convo and I notice the signal gates across the way coming down and then...
BAM!

The signal gate on our side hit the roof of my truck! We were both a bit stunned and not thinking Jason just backed up instead of just going over the tracks (The train was still way off in the distance wailing his damn horn) He slammed the truck into reverse, and made all the cars behind us back up! As he backed up the gate scraped my truck and then dropped down mere inches from the hood of my vehicle! I busted out laughing at the idiocy of the situation. Then I became a bit embarrassed... Seriously, there was a line of cars behind us and I am sure some had to be my neighbors. Being as we were in MY car, I did not want these people to think I was the moron driving!!!
Jason assured me that he "gots this" and the second the gate lifted he floored it... The problem? He was STILL in reverse! No Lie. Thankfully, the car behind us was way back and we did not hit him! I busted out laughing and he was seriously humiliated at this point!

Still thinking I may know someone in the dozens of cars behind us, I refused to allow him to drive to our house (my logic was that if we didn't go directly home no one would realize that it was MY car. I mean there are a million black expeditions out there right?) So I made him turn into the golf course for a few minutes.

Our journey did not end there however... As I finally deem it safe to return home, we leave the golf course. The problem? He goes out the entrance! Seriously?!?!

All this from the same guy who says I can't drive.... Well from where I'm sitting, I think someone needs to return to driving school!

10 Reasons Anesthesia Makes Me Laugh

**Since we are away this week, I thought I would post some funnies from the past... Originally posted June 2009)**

Jason had his Wisdom teeth removed today, the poor guy! He did entertain me though! :)

10 Reasons Anesthesia Makes Me Laugh

telling the oral surgeon that his office is "ghetto because there is tape on the ceiling"

picking nose for 20 minutes and insisting that something was there (there wasn't)

giggling uncontrollably about my "boobie splitter" (my seat belt!)

mumbling something incoherent only to say aloud "this must be an A to A conversation since you aren't listening" after a few minutes of silence

Begging to go to best buy to get the new "punch out Mike Tyson game"

Begging again as we pass by Wal-Mart

Insisting he could "totally drive home right now" (yeah okay)

"the sarcasm is so uh" (wait five minutes before his though finishes) 'unnecessary"

reminding me to get gas 5 minutes AFTER I got gas!!!

and last but not least:

Being able to see him look so crazy out of it!

*he's such a good sport, he even gave me picture approval! He is doing well so far! I hope he continues! :)

If you give a mommy a bag...

**Since we are away this week, I thought I would post some funnies from the past... Originally posted April 2010)**

If you give a mommy a bag,
She will remember to head outside to pick up the dog poop.

Once outside, she will pick up a pile and children will ask her for some bubbles.
So inside she goes!

As she reaches for the bubbles, 2 bottles of glitter fall to the floor! Upon inspection mommy sees that they remained intact, (Whew!!!) so she continues to dig for the bubble blowers.

As she digs, a little boy enters and quietly OPENS BOTH glitter bottles and proceeds to run through the house sprinkling glitter in his wake!

After a stern warning, mommy sends the little boy outside with the bubbles, and heads for the vacuum...
While she vacuums up piles of glitter, she spies a lone puzzle piece and returns it to its lost home!

Once the vacuuming is complete (10 minutes TOPS have passed), mommy fixes the children lunch and goes outside to get them...

Upon walking outside mommy sees that the little boy and girl have made a HUGE potion making mess with the bubbles, sand, and water!
Mommy somehow keeps her cool and sends the kids in for lunch while she cleans up yet another mess!

However, the messes did not end as a silly little boy got ketchup ALL over the fabric chairs! This time she did yell, and sent the children to the playroom while she scrubbed her BRAND new chair!

Once the scrubbing was done (2 minutes later), Mommy finds the children filling their mouths with juice and spitting the juice into play cups. Most of the juice missed the target and ended up all over the already stained carpet!

Mommy and her minis clean it up and finally head back outside to play...
Once outside mommy spies a bag and remembers to finally clean up the dog poop!


****

True story!

This was my day today! The first mess began at 9 and I finally finished cleaning the poop at 4:30!

Sometimes I just have to shake my head and ask WHY?

**Since we are away this week, I thought I would post some funnies from the past... Originally posted October 2009)**

Today is Disney on Ice (Yippee) I am so excited!! The kids are even more so and it is just gonna be a BLAST! Jason is working where the show is today, so we are meeting him there....

This morning as he was headed to work, he stuck his head in the door and asked me to get a car wash.... I NEVER get car washes.... In our house that is HIS job.... After asking a million questions as to HOW to do this (the whole conveyor belt thing freaks me out because if my wheels get messed up I am in trouble. Yes, I have 24's on my car. I HATE them. He had to have them. People see this pimped out blacked out truck and out pops Suzy homemaker dragging two kids.... Its quite hilarious.... Anyway, I digress as usual!)

So to the car wash I went.... I made it through the conveyor belt successfully and gave my self an imaginary high five! I was overly confident at that moment.... Just a moment too soon! The next thing I know the hair dryer thing goes off and water starts pouring in from everywhere!!! Door handles, the sunroof, my seat belt holder thing, and WORST of all... The TV!!!

Let's just say I started hyperventilating and frantically tried to wipe up the sea of water flowing into my truck!!! I am wiping and wiping and it just keeps coming! The buzzer is sounding telling me to move my big ass truck, but the water is still coming!
At this point I slam to truck into drive while wiping and move out of the car wash building....

The water continued to drop in the WHOLE way home! I just laughed and laughed! Shockingly I did not cry! My headliner is soaked, my heated seats were soaked, and the TV was soaked! I am praying the TV works or Jason is going to be PISSED! I totally left the sunroof cracked.... oops my bad!

I am so not telling him!!! Honestly though, this is what he gets when he asks me to do HIS job.... ;) just kidding! I am just a MORON but I am still not telling him! I just pray its all dried out before he has to get into it!

PS: Jason still HAS NOT found out about this.... hehehe!