About 2 weeks before Anthony's birthday a package arrived addressed to Anthony and Madison from my mother in law... The kids were pumped and we opened it and Madison was OVERJOYED! The box was filled with dresses, barbies, coloring books, story books, My Little Ponies, and a brand spankin' new purse! I could barely lift the box, it was that HUGE!
Madison could barely contain herself!! Anthony? The poor guy got a shirt and a a pair of shorts. Honestly, he was pissed, but I explained we need to appreciate what we receive and that its the thought that counts. He was NOT getting it, maybe he'll grasp that at the ripe old age of 6? My mother in law called and told him a package was on the way for him, as his things did not fit in the box. So he waits. It never comes. He asks, but at this point what do you say? It really breaks my heart...
Then on his birthday, my mother in law calls to wish him a happy day and says she mailed him a gift card for trains. The missing package is forgotten for now, but yet he still waits and I KNOW nothing is going to come. See this is the drill. Promises are made, but never followed through. Things are done for one and not the other. This has been the trend since we were married 15 years ago. It's nothing new and Jason and I are totally used to it, BUT it makes me so MAD when it happens to the kids....
Then, my parents were supposed to come for Anthony's birthday party, but unfortunately, they had to cancel. Anthony cried all the way to his party because "Grand mom and Pop Pop were missing it" We felt so bad. But what can we do?!? We explained that they would come soon, but that things had happened and they could not visit this time... Once we got to the party all was forgotten and fun was had.
But still each day I hear, "Mommy did my package come? Did my money card come? Its supposed to be coming mommy, when will it be here?" It makes me feel bad. I want to lay it out there and tell him how it will never come, but I just hate to break his heart. Maybe I'll go buy him a damn gift card and cover the mother in law's ass... just this once!
So how do you handle it when people let your kids down? I am sure we are not handling it right... Jason refuses to call his mother out, because he knows she is a shit, but I think he should. He just avoids, that's his way. Me? I hate confrontation, but I won't lie, this mama bear comes out when her cubs are done dirty.... Thoughts?
6 thoughts:
I'm not married, nor do I have any kids, but I certainly have my share of irritating relatives. Normally I'm of the opinion that it's no one's place to talk about someone else's mother, so I would encourage your husband to say something to her, but if he won't, I say go for it. That's SO unfair to poor Anthony, and if that were my kid I'd sure be pissed too.
I do know what it's like to get the shaft at the hands of relatives who play favorites, and, well, you get used to it, but it does suck when you're little.
I hope Anthony had a great birthday nonetheless!
Oooh, that is so awful. My in-laws favor my sister in law's daughter, b/c she lives near them. And they openly say, "If YOU lived near us, we would buy your kids..."
And when we're up there, everything revolves around said child.
It's annoys the heck out of me.
If I were you, I would pounce. I do NOT handle people making my children promises and then not following through (especially when they don't even intend to follow through. That is called LYING)
That sucks and I know how you feel. When I married my wife she already had our daughter until a few tears later my wife and I had our son. My mother had the balls to send my son a christmas card filled with money and not my daughter. WTF! I haven't spoken to my mother in 20 yrs and I am not sure if she thought this was a way back into my life but it wasn't. It actually made me more pissed off. So pissed off I gave the card to my grandmother and told her to tell my mother to either send a card to both of them or don't send any at all. You know what she decided. Not to send any at all. Guess she doesn't give a crap about me or my kids. So sad.
So I know how you and your son feel and I am so sorry about this. You need to call her out on this or it will continue to happen forever.
I am sorry Staci-
That's a tough one. And it sucks. Maybe send her a really pretty card with chocolate, all pretty in a bow.... and a note that says, EVERYONE likes getting stuff in the mail...maybe next time JUST SURPRISE the kids, because it is making me crazy watching Anthony watch for yours every day and it is breaking my heart. If she doesn't get the point then FAIR GAME chicka! And being more blunt is absolutely fair too.
That is just so wrong.
We're estranged from my parents and one of the reasons is because they didn't send my kids a Christmas or Birthday present this last year. They claimed that money was tight....but they can afford vodka and trips to Mexico.
It's just not right.
Man, that sucks. I don't even know what to suggest. Maybe a shopping trip? Kids are smarter than we give them credit for. Maybe you should explain that she is unreliable, so if anything arrives he should see it as a pleasant surprise, but not to expect anything? Gosh, that is so awful!
On a different subject, have you ever considered doing a full RSS feed to blog readers? I am often in a hurry and skip the ones that don't post the whole entry. Just a thought!
Post a Comment